Chapter 253: The heart laden with worries must pine not (1)

No matter which identity Wang Qinian adopted, what he said after that was a little too much.

An Fei departed from the elegant teahouse of Dong Lin City, her heart laden with a myriad of emotions. The colorful and rambunctious scenery of the street-side markets and avenues of entertainment seemed to have blurred into the fringes of her vision, prohibited from arousing even the slightest of her attention.

As she walked by, her body was peppered with the unceasing hurricane of an innumerable number of people strolling the streets as they sought their pastime enjoyments.

The <Steps of Underlying Shadow> guided her figure forwards without the slightest intention of becoming swallowed into the sea of humans, ejecting An Fei from the bustling street in a matter of moments.

The young girl lightly stumbled once, her feet continuing to propel her body forwards. As she continued to walk, An Fei did not know of her direction of which her body was headed, or where she had ended up in the five sectors of Dong Lin City.

The scenery of the world merged into a uniform plane of a monotonous grey, the intersecting paths and horizons smeared into an unfathomable haze. The sky, sun, and the moon vanished from sight, their presence barred from intruding into the surroundings.

Without beacon or light illuminating her surroundings, the young girl continued to walk with a deadpan expression.

Her figure appeared lonesome and desolate, as though she were incompatible with the rest of the world, even the monotonous splotch of color that had consumed it.

Her feet continued to persist in the motions of walking forwards, yet it was unknown how far she had actually traversed.

Her heart musing in silence, An Fei lightly repeated several questions in her mind.

“Was I wrong to uphold a hope for this world after having escaped from that cruel environment?”

The answer… was a resounding no.

When An Xiangyang had drawn the mysterious symbol on the ground to transport her soul to the Shattered Star Continent, the elderly man had specifically reminded her that not everything was the purest reflection of a fairy’s daydream.

She had been warned to expect suffering and tribulation amongst her happiness, for she was being implanted into a world, not a limitless daydream.

Hence, the young girl had decided to open her heart after having stabilized her circumstances upon the Shattered Star Continent.

She encountered a benevolent and open-hearted Wei Xuan who seemed to be unable to withhold himself from showering her soul with affection and familial care; even Luo Shuyan, the mirror replica of the penultimate target of her hate could not restrain her eyes from misting over in apology for her body’s miserable condition.

Although the concept of possessing two legal mothers was odd and sometimes uneasy to stomach, Sheng Miaolan had never discriminated against her for having been birthed from a different mother and the same father.

Even Yan Yue did not seem to possess the vicious traits that An Fei had been subject to for many years… which convinced her to open a crevice towards her heart’s sanctuary. Her efforts were similarly not unrewarded, for her experiences at Jiang’an were not unfruitful nor sorrowful days.

However…

“Am I truly right to hope?”

The Empress dared to sell her marriage, an unrelated person, for the advancement of her personal interests. Though An Fei doubted the veracity of the Soul-Binding Contract’s efficacy on her soul that was both pampered and tormented by the Sanctum, the fact that Feng Yu Xin even dared to perform such a task…

Shen Ming Yue was nice and considerate towards her as she adopted the role and personality of a caring elder sister, but was she truly sincere?

Shen Haoren and the Shen Family, why was there always a thin sliver of doubt regarding their actions and motives? Why did Yang Jian, Tang Yunhe, Wen Jiu, Du Yongkang, and even Tang Shiqi seem to possess an ulterior motive when they approached her?

Why?

Why, why, why?

Why was it that everyone who dared to approach her wished to exploit her body, her heart, her soul, until all that remained was her remains and their acquired aspirations and dreams?

Shen Ming Yue was exceedingly kind and considerate in her actions, but what hid underneath that exuberant figure, that charming personality radiating a beautiful brilliance?

Shen Haoren seemed to resemble a boisterous fellow, Yang Jian a being of righteous upbringing that refused to waver before evil, and Tang Shiqi appeared to be no less than the manifestation of a novel’s protagonist; virtuous, kind and noble, capable of weathering all storms…

These people were merely a few of the many that wandered around in the human sea that was the Shattered Star Continent, but what did they truly resemble? An Fei could only reply with a single statement.

All men bow before the threat of failure and death.

Her own father was a perfect example.

Just like Shen Haoren, he knew how to manage interpersonal relationships and foster intimate bonds with companions.

Just like Yang Jian, he was a fellow of upright morals and ethics that were to be admired, one who respected the common good and detested those who dared to wander through society with immoral impunity.

Just like Tang Shiqi, her father was once noble, virtuous, and capable of withstanding pressure without faltering in his goals…

And yet, what had happened?

With the allure of wealth, he dared to render his family members helpless as disposable pawns, exploiting their worth and discarding them the moment they posed as a disadvantage towards the advancement of his social career.

Wielding the weapons known as underground gambling and exchange, he sold away her human rights since her birth, arising to a terrible experience as a child.

With the allure of reputation and social standing, her father dared to tie himself to the Chen Family with the intention of gradually consuming the financial behemoth and becoming its conqueror.

Thus, her grandfather and herself were tossed away, disowned from the An Family without a bat of his eyelid.

With the devil’s temptation known as the fear of death, he panicked upon eavesdropping on An Xiang Yang’s murmurs about the special properties of the platinum mirror and how she, An Fei, was going to receive it as a birthday present. Thus, began the descent for a miserable, miserable hell for the young girl.

From the days of which she could retain the slightest bits of her dignity and identity by ignoring the Chen Family and her father’s demands, she had been forced to crawl through muddy grounds, hide within the subzero mountain ranges and marshes inundated with poison.

She was originally a disgraced Young Lady of a reputable family, and yet in the span of one day, reduced to something even worse than the most diseased beggar.

At the end of the day, the world’s governments would not issue the military and private security companies to hunt after a beggar until they were captured without any ability to resist.

If even her father could perform such a transformation that seemed to defy the mandates of heaven, what was to be said that people like Shen Haoren, Yang Jian, and Shen Ming Yue were immune to it?

The whispers of fear against death was exceedingly contagious, and equally pervasive of the human soul. It was unknown when bosom friends would suddenly stab her in the back, or sell her out to an enemy.

Thus, it was important to seal the heart.

Those who wielded righteousness as their heart’s sword could be the world’s gentlest and clear-minded existence, or the cruelest murderer.

Those who appeared kind were always concealing a bitter darkness in their heart, one that was forced to be contained without any avenue of release. Hence, when it were to be prodded even the slightest bit, the transformation would be devastating to witness…

Those who dared to foster ambition were to be avoided.

Those who dared to become intimate with her were to be shunned.

Those who dared to approach her, she was to ignore.

Those that…

“Young Miss, would you like a drink?”

A cheerful voice interrupted her thoughts, dragging the young girl from the monochromic blur that had trapped her consciousness. Rapidly blinking her eyes to ensure that the scene before her was not an illusion, An Fei couldn’t help but allow her mouth to hang open in a daze.

Without her awareness, she had been brought to a standstill before a street-side bar stand.

Having been trapped in her thoughts without an avenue of rescue, An Fei had stood in place for several long moments, her countenance hazed and uncomprehending.

The wooden bar stand was clean and elegant, though a simplistic vibe emanated from its structure. When An Fei glanced towards the two people seated before the bar stand, her eyes couldn’t help themselves but widen in surprise.

Two youths were sitting on the rectangular slab of wood before the counter, a small wooden cup full of alcohol grasped in their right hands.

The youths wore the same robe of a mysterious white fabric, spotless and devoid of any blemish whatsoever.

One youth possessed long golden hair; the other’s was a deep violet. As if having detected her inquisitive gaze, the golden-haired youth turned his head around to reveal a pair of dazzling irises of molten gold, a charming smile on his countenance.

“Hello there, Young Miss,” the youth spoke, his voice gentle and detached from immoral emotions.

“Your mind seems rather troubled and in chaos. Would you like a drink?”

- my thoughts:
A short reveal of An Fei's thoughts and past... Jun Mo, Dongfang Yu, what are you two doing at a roadside stall?
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