An Fei witnessed the environment of Goeun City vanish from her sight, the boisterous atmosphere of a semi-prosperous city dissipating into monochromatic hues of color released from the tip of the brush.
She saw each and every possible color in their independent existence, as well as a harmonic blend of their hues that morphed into an overwhelming bastion of scarlet. The intermingled colors swept across her feet and claimed the world, their intrinsic hues morphing into gentle croons of emotion and beckoning.
Who am I?
Who are you?
The two questions resounded through An Fei’s mind, and she saw the young girl standing before her once again.
She stood across the young girl in the monochromatic world of scarlet composed of infinite color, devoid of any passerby, distractions, or even thoughts.
“Who am I? Who are you?” An Fei echoed the questions, her countenance devoid of emotions.
Who are I, and who are you?
The questions were reversed and thrown back towards the mysterious young girl, of which she took no heed and dissolved the atmosphere with a gentle smile. The young girl lifted her right leg and took a step back.
Suddenly, An Fei noticed that her left leg had moved a step backwards on its own, widening the distance between the two by a small margin.
Her mind flickering with a faint shock and inexplicable fear, An Fei stared deeply into the pair of scarlet irises that stared back towards her. She still remained captivated by the two questions, but couldn’t find an appropriate answer for them.
Who was she?
Was she not An Fei, the young girl of a modernized society that emphasized on technology and scientific knowledge, a resident of a modernized world that stood on the shoulders of numerous ancient civilizations shattered of their foundational beliefs and customs?
Was she not the young girl who had been utterly betrayed by her closest kin, and had fled for her life from the remainder of the world because of a single mirror?
At the same time, was she not Wei An Fei of the Shattered Star Continent, the fourth daughter of Wei Xuan? Was she not the owner of the mysterious Sanctum, a palace of sky-blue crystal that loved to toy with her emotions here and then?
But why did it seem so superficial?
“I… I am An Fei!” An Fei forced out with furrowed brows.
“I am An Fei of Shanghai, of Changning District! I don’t know your name, but you are not me!”
“Why am I not you?” the young girl responded with a growing smile.
“I am also An Fei of Jiang’an. I am also An Fei of Shanghai, of Changning District. But you are not me.”
“You may be Wei An Fei of Jiang’an, but you are not An Fei of Shanghai. Why do you say that I am not you?”
An Fei blinked, her heart pounding in a strange yet unexplainable emotion. The young girl across from her took a step forward in response, but An Fei found herself taking a step backwards in exchange.
“I share your appearance, is it not the truth?”
“How is this the truth? I did not look like this when I was in Earth!”
“But this is also an Earth, is it not?” the young girl’s eyes flickered with mockery.
“Since this is Earth, this appearance is shared by both of us. However, you are still not me.”
“Oh? Explain why I am not you, ah?”
An Fei’s brows flared in irritation and annoyance. She raised the taijijian’s point towards the young girl’s heart, the elegant blade flickering with scorching flames.
“You are not me… the reason is simple,” the young girl’s lips curled.
“Broken. Shattered. What else is there to explain?”
Broken? Shattered?
An Fei slowly repeated the words in her heart, but her confusion could only grow. Tightening her grip on the taijijian’s handle, she stared hard at the young girl’s countenance, knowing that she was preparing to explain.
The young girl did part her lips and speak, and the words hammered directly onto An Fei’s heart.
“You are broken. Broken beyond measure, and certainly irreparable. Almost like a shattered piece of glass, once reminiscent of its beauty, but a reminiscence that can only be experienced by itself.”
“Shattered glass can never regain its beauty and appeal, even if the shards are perfectly aligned. As such, the distinct nature of the glass becomes distorted.”
The young girl turned away from An Fei to face the expansive world of scarlet monochrome. Extending her hand, a plume of violet detached itself from the boundaries to curl around the young girl’s arm, flickering with a pure resentment that chipped away at reason.
“You experienced pure betrayal, thus you never appreciate human relationships,” the young girl intoned in a light voice.
“Every act you observe is interpreted as an attack on your life. Every interaction you engage in is defending your existence. And yet, you have no purpose, no goal, no dream to achieve.”
“You dare to never trust and always be suspicious, but become frustrated when others become suspicious. But most of all, you constantly thirst for the suffering of others and their death, because you have been once hounded to death.”
How are you not broken?
The unspoken question reverberated throughout the world of monochrome scarlet, and An Fei felt an invisible slap strike across her countenance, the palm brimming with an unprecedented disdain and mockery.
Her soul flickered with mixture of dread and anger, and she lurched a step forwards towards the back of the young girl.
The taijijian had unexpectedly been replaced with a plain folded fan.
“Indeed, I am constantly suspicious, constantly defending my existence, and have no purpose,” An Fei scowled.
“That is only natural given that I am a mortal, and my own circumstances. However, who are you to declare such judgement? If you are indeed Wei An Fei of this world, then having been sleeping for the entirety of your existence, where do you have the right?”
“Even a mortal would not sustain flaws of such magnitude,” the young girl chided with a gentle voice.
“By interacting with the environment and other souls, a mortal soul is branded by certain sentiments and emotions, several of which vary in magnitude depending on their experiences. Each brand influences their following behavior, which mortals have come to accept as the process of learning from experience.”
“The mortal soul has only a single flaw, that it is unable to sustain such influences for a prolonged period of time. As such, upon a mortal’s death, their souls are cleansed to experience the world anew.”
“Ultimately, a mortal’s soul is perfectly clean and devoid of impurity, and has no divergent nature despite whatever personality they might display on the exterior. However, your soul… is rather warped at its roots,” the young girl smiled.
“You were born to hate, to despise the world and wish its destruction for what it has once inflicted onto you. Naturally, you would lack any desire to accomplish a certain dream. Your soul is cracked; it cannot sustain even a single nature, which is why you bound from extreme aggression and bloodthirst to ultimate laziness and lethargy.”
“What can you be described as anything other than broken? You reflect the direct opposite of human nature. However repugnant they may be, every human wish for social interaction; societies continue to thrive for this very reason, however corrupt its fundamental principles may be. You, on the other hand… at your roots, you desire to be completely alone, devoid of social interaction.”
“Indeed, you are An Fei, and I am also An Fei,” the young girl lightly whirled around to face An Fei, her lips curled into a sneer.
“We are both An Fei of Shanghai, of Changning District, as well as Wei An Fei of Jiang’an. But while I am An Fei, you are not me. You are not An Fei, a heart-protecting jade, but instead An Fei – a mindless aggregation of indiscriminate anger and hate.”
An Fei opened her mouth to ruthlessly refute, but found her throat sealed and unable to push the denial past her lips.
She recalled the strokes that she had bitterly slashed out on the governmental form that determined her legal identity.
They constituted ‘fei’ of anger, and not ‘fei’ of green jade.
“This… I did write ‘anger’ as my name,” An Fei slowly enunciated.
“However, you mentioned something interesting just then; that we are both An Fei of Shanghai and Jiang’an. Are you not insinuating that you share the same soul as I – and how are you any different from the ‘broken’ attributes that you have identified?”
The young girl did not answer, and instead waved the brush in her fingers. Each movement of the brush was supplemented by an infusion of color different from the scarlet monochrome encompassing the world, and soon, An Fei found a character formed from shimmering light of dazzling colors.
Wreathed in a dazzling aura of colors that excluded any hue of scarlet, An Fei saw the character for ‘hun’, representing the immortal soul of a person. At the same time, she heard the young girl’s voice directly besides her ears, the mockery within bare of any disguise.
“How do you know that you possess the soul of An Fei? Little phantom of aggregate hate and anger, can you truly claim that you are the legitimate owner of An Fei’s soul when you can’t even claim ownership of it – much less write its character?”
