God does not exist, which proves that we will never be delivered from our sorrows.
If the idea of salvation exists, it would only be logical that tragedies would cease to be.
In the future, we will realize that even if we want to believe in it, the very concept of mercy is a lie in itself.
No one will be saved, such is the nature of the world.
*
I accepted a long time ago I was only a scapegoat for mockery.To satisfy their impure hearts, humans destroy what they build and take pleasure in inflicting harm to their own kind.
For example, at “Santa Maria”, the establishment I frequent, a rather small school located in New York, I’ve been bullied ever since I started my first year here. Even so, no one has reached out to me when I was mocked and abused by what society would call peers.
To prove their superiority in this depraved world, these inferior beings that we are revel in a arbitrary hierarchy they made up to satisfy their sense of superiority. The weaker the mind the easier it is to be the target of both adult and people of the same age.As if it was the animal kingdom, the world is dominated by the law of the strongest. Ineptitude like no other. A complete and utter Ineptitude.
Just the other day, I came across a bunch of kids having fun stoning a poor helpless stray dog.
However, I do not pity those who attack the weak, after all, they have earned it. If only they fought back, they could confront all the sources of their misfortune.
They deserve it. I deserve it.
After all, I am weak.
As I headed to my classroom, I find myself thrown against one of the lockers, grasping for air.
A backhand caresses me, while I assume a defensive position.
I recognize this ritual to which I am accustomed. My attacker, the most popular girl in this school, Ellie, always had a grudge against me.
“Allison, how many times do I have to tell you? When I walk through this hallway, you kneel.”
She says, clearly putting on my foot with hers.
Confused, I can only observe this poor specimen. It’s people like her who remind me why I hate mankind so much. Always pursuing useless ideas such as love, popularity and friendship.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about…”
On edge, she couldn’t contain the joy of kicking brutally my stomach.
As she continued her assault, an audience started forming around us. As I thought, there was no chance of being saved in the first place.
They’ll keep watching as there is nothing to gain from interfering.
“Don’t try to play smart, I know people like you.They think they’re better than me, but they always end up at my feet.”
I wondered if she meant that litteraly. Did she think she was like an object of worship or something akin to this nature?
Yet another day when this narcissistic fool thought only of her own navel. I could only observe , as I stopped feeling anything when it came to her meddling aeons ago.
Those things people call emotions, I had lost them already.
“That look! Always that look! As if you were looking down on me! “
Over the three years I had already spent there and several incidents, I had developped what people call “dead eyes”, for some reason, they got me in trouble with her often.
Enraged, she grabbed me by the hair and dragged me to the toilet. Blocking the door.
“That bitch will never change…”
Was the only faint noise I could hear followed by footsteps getting further and further.
“Must have left.”
Forced to stay in this place for what could be hours, I was about to make the most important decision of my life.
“I’ve had enough.”
I didn’t care anymore. I stopped caring. It would be a relief at this point.
Digging through my bag, I finally found the holy grail of deliverance.
“I won’t have to put up with this stupid world anymore.”
A feeling of excitement took over as the object’s blade approached my neck, before it turned into fear.
The blade still dangerously close to my life, I could only lament my own weakness.
“In the end, I don’t have the courage to take my own life.”
“Um…. What are you doing?”
A little girl said,calling me out in the middle of the act, watching me with disdain. Her outfit was pretty ridiculous, wearing the school uniform with a coat and a witch2witchA race of beings capable of using otherwordly abilities. Their magic abilities usually develop in their teenage years hat for some reason.
“It’s none of your business.”
“Who turns their back on someone who tries to commit suicide?”
“I hate self righteous people like you, go care about someone who wants you to care.”
“No! Not until you drop those scissors!”
I really hate people like her, always trying to reason with lost causes.
“Do me a favor and go home, kid.”
“Hey, I’m fifteen! Fifteen ! It’s just my size, I can’t do anything about it!”
How could you even be fifteen and be the size of a middle schooler ?
She sighed and pointed to the knife in my hands.
“Attraction.”
The scissors twirled to land in her hands.
“Huh?”
Was it a trick ? How could she even do that ?
“Impressed, eh? I expect no less from a poor mortal. I allow you to be amazed before me, Heisenberg, witch EXTRAORDINAIRE!”
” A Witch?”
“In the flesh!”
I knew I was attracting bullies but I didn’t know I was attracting weirdos too.
Where did this one come from? Did she really think she was going to convince me with such a deception? I could tell she was lying.
“I used Ianua to get in there, moving those boxes would have taken too long.”
“Ia-what-now?”
She looked at me with an accentuated surprise, as if I had said something extremely stupid.
“Ah right, lesser beings do not know teleportations spells”
This eccentric creature was clearly speaking gibberish and making stuff up. As if teleportation spells were a real thing.
“You’re clearly crazy.”
” People often said that to me, I wonder why.”
On top of being weird, she was dense.
“Anyway, i’ll get you out of here and confiscate those scissors wether you like it or not”
“With your appearance, those sounds like empty threats.”
She traced a circle in front of the locked door, tracing a line that seemed to cut space itself,leaving me speechless. The hole she made came with a full view of the corridors with the lockers.
“So, are you impressed?”
“Must be a sham … “
“That’s why I don’t like people like you, we always have to convice you the supernatural is real. I’ll say it once again so it gets in your cranium, I am a bonafide witch.”
“Who would believe stories of witchcraft … “
“Ones that just saw someone open a portal to somewhere else.”
As dumb as she seemed, she was making a good point.
“By the way, I’m Lila,Lila Heisenberg5Lila HeisenbergAn aloof girl always wearing a party hat, she's relatively small for her age. She is half german., part-time witch.”
What the hell even was a part time witch?
“Since when do witches work part-time? “
“Hey, I endanger my life so you people can’t know about weird creatures you wouldn’t be able to handle.”
She made me sign to follow her, while readjusting her strange hat, a perfume of mystery accompanying her.
“In two days, a tragedy will come.”
I had already met eccentric people, however it was the first time I stayed so close to one of them.
“Lalalala~”
I wondered how she was even able to find the strenght to hum a tune after throwing out an heavy hitter like that.
“Um, Lila, right? Where are you taking me?”
The smile she displayed at that time did not foretell anything worthwhile.
“At the occult research center”
Despite what she said, I was sure that I had never heard of such a place in this establishment.
“Mortals like you like to call it “a club”. “
“So it’s a club.”
“Do you listen when people talk to you? How dare you compare my center to one of those cheap clubs?”
“Because it is.”
“Lalalala, I hear nothing!”
Perhaps she was actually a child, resorting to the same tactics as them to win an argument.
“I’ll allow you to bask in our presence. We have an important meeting today.”
The exact moment I set one foot in this room, a look of terror appeared on the other two people present.
It may have been my imagination, but I was sure I could also see a two-tailed cat.
One of the two individuals got up from his chair and stared straight at me, pointing at me with a strange stick. She looked sick to her stomach, turning white as soon as our eyes met.
“Lila, this person. She’s dangerous.”
“Personally, I think she is more dangerous to herself than others.”
“If you say so, but all this evil karma emanating from her.”
“Evil karma?”
To remain in the strangeness of this day, the members of this club strutted out nonsensical terms, of the kind of evil karma, while Lila handed me a mirror.
“You should take a look. I mean, if you want to see your funeral face.”
“You little … “
A feeling of disgust came to deprive me of my motor functions from the moment I interviewed this mirror. A jet black aura surrounding me in the reflection, my own face painted in dark observing me with a calculating smile .
“Your reflection disgusts you so much? “
Asked the girl wearing quilts, sitting at the corner of the room. Still not bothering to directly look at me.
“People like you who have negative thoughts accumulate an incredible amount of karma and release it into the air.”
Lila continued, rubbing her nose with pride.
“I’m not sure I’m following you. Also, do you realize I still don’t believe a word of what you’re saying, hm … What was it again? Lilo? “
“It’s Lila! But I prefer mortals like you to worship me under the name of the incredible Heisenberg! “
The other two, as well as the strange cat, looked at her with exasperation. Letting me guess that it was not the first time that she released this line.
“I allow you to sing my praises if you wish.”
She said, riding her big horses, her ego higher than the mountains of Alaska.
“Shut up! All I want is explanations! Cheap witch!”
“How dare you, Allison?”
From my recollection, I never gave my name to that person. WHere did she get it ?
“Um, Miss Lila, could we start?”
The girl with duvets called her to order.
“Have you ever heard of the Apocalypse as it is written , my dear Allison?”
As she began to preach, my irritation grew.
“Written?”
“The Bible, dear Allison. Do you they not know anything in this damn building?”
The other girl in the room gave her a violent blow at the base of her skull, recalling her to act in order.
“A little more serious, Miss Lila!”
After putting aside the pain, Lila or should I say the proclaimed extraordinary witch sat down. As she rubbed the base of her head, she pulled a crystal ball out of the drawer in front of her.
“Observe .”
I stared intensely at her crystal ball, wondering why I kept indulging these strange people. It was then that I was presented with the most horrible images I had ever seen.
In the crystallized world, I could recognize this city, covered with flames and charred corpses. Creatures with inexplicable forms dismembering and devouring civilians.
” … “
Lila’s tone changed drastically, adopting a much more serious tone of voice.
“Unfortunately, it’s not your imagination. What’s more, this horrible premonition is supposed to happen today.”
Impossible, it was completely impossible for me to believe her. There was no chance that the atrocities she had shown me were real!
Exasperated, I ran away from their landmark, running aimlessly.
“That’s why I hate mortals. We present them with proven facts and they will always flee from the truth.”
As I ran away from that far-fetched place, I couldn’t help but wonder if in the end, she was right…
Even if it were true, what did they hope to do to stop such acts?
A cold sensation stopped me in my run, taking control of my body, no longer able to feel my arms and legs, as if paralyzed by an unknown force.
It was then that a distant voice, in its echo, communicated these words to me:
“Only one messiah has the right to shape the world in his own way …”
“Who are you? What is a messiah?”
The more I struggled, the more the strength of these invisible chains I could feel on me grew.
The voice continued:
“Through time I have been given many names. Our Father, Guardian Angel, God.”
I had not dreamed, this strange voice had just declared itself divinity.
“Unfortunately, these insipid beings that are Man do not understand the order of things. In their pride, they forgot me. No matter how much they deny it, the world has only one destiny, chaos.”
The more that voice spoke, the more it forced me to doubt its so-called divinity. A god would wish for chaos?
As if hearing my thoughts, the voice replied:
“Why do you doubt so much, when it is in accordance with what you also wish, my dearest Allison?”
” … “
“I can see the darkest desires buried in mortal depths. I can see your dream. It seems to me a desire so tenacious that it makes me blush.
” … “
“Allison, my child, you wish to destroy the human world. Isn’t that nothing but the truth ?”
“To wish it and to really want it are two different things. I wouldn’t be better than them if I wanted them all to die.”
The voice disappeared completely, giving way to a black aura , a huge giant eye fixing me right in the eyes, standing in the middle of the grotesque shape that the aura had taken.
“Too late. You are now an apostle of Apophis, your desires are mine.”
Despite the fact that this heap of form had no mouth ,I could feel a smile of the most evil nature sketch in it slowly and surely.
As the feeling of paralysis disappeared, I found myself thrown towards the ground, lockers and corridors now surrounded by purple flames.
My glasses did not survive the fall, so I was forced to get rid of them.
A miracle …
My vision was completely perfect, it now contained no blur.
“Aaaah!”
I recognized this voice, it was Lila’s colleague. The noise seemed to come from the room I had left.
As I said I was still running away, ignoring the cries of agony that I could hear resonate, an unidentifiable projectile passed two centimeters from me.
I turned around to find that the projectile in question was Lila, who had surprisingly survived such a throw.
“First, tehy doubt my abilities, now that?! It’s starting to do piss me off.”
The thirst for blood in her eyes was extremely intense.
“Oh, Allison. As you can see, I’m a little busy, could you get out of here?”
Her childish tone had now become completely authoritarian.
“Your right eye … “
She said, observing me with surprise
I had no idea what she was getting at, wondering if she was making a joke in a situation like that.
“It’s not a joke, you fool. Look.”
She had just read my mind, again?
She created a mirror, visibly from nothing, to reflect my image.
In the reflection, I could see a strange cross symbol in my right eye, not to mention the fact that my eyes, naturally green blue, were now purple.
