“Mirai…”
Onii and Amae said in unison as the Heavenlight made her grand entrance. Contrary to the grim vibe, the arena seemed to be brimming in hope. It was as if a hero had descended in the nick of time to save the day.
“Amae.”
Mirai advanced forward and held her hand gently. The motes of warm light above the angelic girl pulsated as the two finally touched.
“It’s not good for you to fight.” The Heavenlight presented a beaming smile that was as radiant as the morning dawn. “Please let me handle this situation.”
Meanwhile, Doragon furrowed her brows, seemingly baffled by the situation. She plopped a lollipop in her mouth and watched silently, analyzing the situation.
“No,” Amae shook her head. “This is my duel with Doragon. I have to do this—”
“—But this isn’t the best decision for the two of you, right?”
Onii could sense something inscrutable behind those words. It was almost as if Mirai knew about their mission and had purposefully intervened at this exact moment. But how could she have known in the first place?
Amae bit her lower lips, looking slightly troubled.
“Please don’t stop me, Mirai. This is something I have to do. I cannot allow Doragon to continue this nonsensical act up any longer.”
The resolution in his litter sister’s voice was backed with an admirable will. Hearing Amae’s reason, Onii expected the Heavenlight to leave her be. But on the contrary, Mirai remained strong in her position.
“I’m the Third Seat of the S-rank,” Glancing towards the Half-Dragon, Mirai spoke softly. “And as of now, she is two Seats below me. Thus, it will be better if I engage in the duel. I know what Doragon is like — her skills, magical abilities, strategies and I know she can’t be reasoned with words but only violence.”
It was at this exact moment the two siblings realized Mirai’s true intention. She continued in a reassuring voice.
“I promise — as long as you believe in us, we will be there to protect you. Remember?”
Those were the same exact words that Amae and Onii had told her four years ago in Temecula. Distant memories of the past did not seem so far away at this moment.
“Now it’s my turn, Amae. I promise — as long as you believe in me, I will be there to protect you two.”
Clenching her fist into a ball and closing her eyes, Amae paused.
She inhaled a deep breath as the room turned quiet. The silence felt longer than it should. That was because this decision would determine their future astronomically.
It was an outcome that might even make or break Duality. Their siblingship. Their mission.
Instead of a reply, Amae nodded. But the decision must have been so overwhelming because after the gesture, she walked away with black bangs covering her entire face.
The atmosphere grew tense once again as Amae stepped out.
“Psh~ You just had to come and ruin the fun, Mirai.” Doragon frowned, presenting an air of hostility. “And I was about to earn a slave.“
Mirai shivered slightly at the last word but remained composed. Turning towards Onii, she spoke warmly.
“Go after Amae.”
“How about you?”
“I know Doragon. There’s no way I will ever lose to someone like her.”
It would indeed be wise for Mirai to fight given she had prior knowledge about their opponent. Deep inside his mind, Onii could only hear the maturity in her voice — she has grown much stronger both physically and mentally since the past four years.
“This is not your fight to take, Onii. It’s elsewhere.”
Her golden eyes glanced over at the door that Amae had run out of.
Onii knew that Mirai was trying to save their siblingship. Her intervention was a chance for Amae to come back to a full circle and rethink the situation.
“Thank you, Mirai. I owe you one.”
With a grateful bow, Onii headed for the exit. As he turned around to see what was happening. Mirai took off the red ribbon that tied her hair to a side pony-tail and placed it in her pocket. That was when Onii remembered — the memento that Amae had given her.
Dark mana. Blank eyes. Black aura. Those were no longer apparent and instead, Mirai seemed like a different person. The light appeared much more holy and brighter. Onii wondered what sort of challenges and hardships she had to overcome.
“Oh my Mirai, I didn’t know you were capable of evoking any emotions. This is the first time your face looks so awfully angry right now~”
“I warned you at our last meeting,” The lights in the air seemed to flicker dangerously. “Yet, you refused to listen. I will make you pay for causing trouble to Amae and Onii.”
The halo above her shined brilliantly as a pair of white wings gradually spread out from her back. Turning towards the judge, Mirai spoke coldly.
“I will be taking Amae’s place. Same bet.”
“INTERESTING-!” Doragon’s crimson-red eyes shined with intense fervor. “TO THINK YOU ARE WILLING TO TRANSFORM FOR THE TWO.”
“You underestimated my relationship. Remember my warning. I intend to keep my words .”
“I CAN’T WAIT, MIRAI.”
Spitting out the lollipop to the floor, Doragon widened her eyes and grinned sadistically. Her voice was now deeper and filled with a carnivorous desire, almost as if it was her true form. In stark contrast to the snow-white angel, her entire body gradually grew midnight-black as sizzling mana began to envelop her.
“ENOUGH TALK. LET US BEGIN THE DUEL.”
♦ ♦ ♦
Onii managed to find his little sister, running towards the more secluded part of Temple Academy. Thanks to the「Ring of Interconnection」, the ancient runes would shimmer based on the proximity of its contracted user. After turning the corner, he saw her near the Potential’s private garden. Using Martial Arts, he immediately caught up.
Amae stopped moving as Onii grabbed onto her uniform’s sleeves.
A cold breeze flew by as the nearby cherry blossoms danced to the passing gust, releasing several pink petals in the process. Drifting like the ebb and flow of the ocean waves, some of them landed between the siblings.
“Isn’t it weird how you can actually feel the pain in your chest and stomach when something really hurts your feelings?
Onii could hear anguish behind those words.
“Why does my heart hurt so much?”
Amae turned around, revealing the expression to her sullen words. Her navy-blue eyes were teary as she spoke in a melancholic voice, looking so vulnerable as if she could break at any moment.
“Why do I feel so powerless? Aren’t we one of the strongest Adventurers in the world, yet why do I feel so weak…?”
This scene was all too familiar. Once again, Onii felt the guilt crept up behind him. The inability to say something was coming back.
But this time, it will be different. Onii made up his mind. No matter what happens, he will comfort his little sister.
“You’re not powerless.”
“I am!” Amae cried out in defeat, “I couldn’t even protect the person I love the most!”
“You did.”
“No. I didn’t.”
Onii shook his head and gently held onto his sister’s hand.
“You chose not to fight for the sake of our relationship. For Duality. For us. If that doesn’t speak for itself, then I don’t know what does…”
A moment of silence.
“Is that how it really is…?” Amae paused as her voice trailed off into a delicate whisper. “That must be why my mind told me to say yes…”
“Yes little sister. You made the right choice.”
“You know… it was so hard making that decision…” The little sister stared at him with a pair of dewy eyes. “It was so hard… I wanted to fight Doragon. I wanted to beat her and make her pay for what she did.”
“I know. And I’m so proud of you for making that decision.”
“Is it okay for me to say how I really feel…?”
“Yes. And I’m here to listen to everything you have to say.”
Onii watched as she poured out her deepest feelings.
“I’m so bitter,” Amae yelled as tears flowed out of her eyes and down the cheeks. “I’m so bitter… I’m so f****** bitter!”
He could slightly understand the frustration that repressed inside her. After all, it was similar to how he felt days ago with Doragon. The inability to do the things you truly want. The powerlessness to achieve the desired results. Both of them possessed actual power to stop the Half-Dragon girl, but could not due to external circumstances.
Because up until today, all the siblings could do was watch the events unfold, drifting along with the ever-changing tide that was of their school life.
♦ ♦ ♦
Amae continued to cry, feeling so damn alone in the world. The duel was supposed to be an act of courage. To protect Onii from Doragon. To showcase that their love should triumph all.
She was even prepared to go all-out. And afterward, she would face the consequences of her decision with a smile. Because this what her heart had wanted.
At least, that was how it should have gone.
But things did not turn out the way she planned.
Life never does.
Mirai’s intervention was a complete surprise. Deep down, Amae was thankful. That was because her old friend had nullified their mistakes for the past week and ultimately, help the siblings regain their identity as Academy students in the espionage mission. It was like a chance to start fresh again.
No matter what, she had to say yes.
But why did I hesitate?
The decision was so damn difficult to the point she could not voice her thought and had to resort to head shaking.
Then it became too overwhelming that she had to leave the arena. Because if she stayed any longer, the bottle of emotions would overflow and spill out uncontrollably. And she did not want her old friend or enemy to see her cry.
Despite making the most logical decision, her heart did not allow her to be happy. In fact, it was cursing nonstop for not beating Doragon and making her pay. How dare her for not standing up and fight, especially when she tried seducing him.
Gah… Now I’m slightly regretting not dueling…
For some reason, she craved the warmness of the one she loved. Maybe it was because her tears continued flowing out or maybe it was because her older brother was standing right in front of her. She wanted something. Something physical. Something to stop this sadness. Something to feel acknowledged.
Ah… I know what I want.
She wanted love.
Those thoughts recurred in her mind. Like a tape stuck on replay, it would not change. Unfortunately, she could not bring the strength to say those words. Those tears were too f****** overwhelming.
Why couldn’t I just be honest about my feelings?
She did not want to tell his brother that she had been crying for the past few days, having let this incident affected during class.
Why didn’t I share everything like we’ve always done in the past?
She needed to be strong and not burden him so much.
What was so difficult this time?
She needed to become independent.
What changed between us?
If all she did was rely on him, then like her instructor said you won’t grow.
Instructor Riggio was right. All she did throughout her life was according to her brother’s decision. She was always afraid to take the next step. To try something new. To step out of her comfort zone.
The decision to leave the Dojo. The creation of Duality. Living in the cabin at Riverside. Enrolling in Temple Academy was all, in fact, her older brother’s decision. Nothing life-changing was made purely by her own determination.
It was not like she minded, having someone to guide and pamper her. She loved being taken care of and having someone to depend on. After all, it was in her name — Amae.
She followed her partner, enjoying the adventure together.
Maybe that’s why I am so bitter.
Bitter that the first major decision I made, I was stopped.
Bitter to the point that tears trickled out and there was an overwhelming amount of frustration and anger. She knew Onii was not the type of person to cheat on her… probably.
I’m so weak.
Why did I just doubt him?
Why?
Why?!
In the past with Adventurer’s Guild, separating for a couple nights was common. And they planned to always see each other during nighttime. People like Doragon were rare but still encountered occasionally when they embarked on their quests with other Guilds. Yet, why did things feel so different to back in the old days?
Could it be that she was afraid of something?
What exactly was she afraid of?
Change.
Suddenly, Amae felt a feeling of utter comfort. It was warm and nice, being blanketed by this positive feeling. She wanted to stay in it forever.
Then she realized that Onii was embracing her. Tightly and lovingly.
The hug that she had been craving for! Somehow, her partner had magically read her thoughts and embraced with all his might.
♦ ♦ ♦
Duality always solved people’s problem. Mighty as they were, it seemed like no one could ever dent the supreme adventure team. After all, they were modern heroes. The living legends. The almighty duo of the legendary swordsman and elemental mage called Yin and Yang.
However, it was an unrealistic facade, established by those who do not truly know the adventurers themselves. A social guise from the public eye, never bothered to empathize from a humanistic perspective. To understand what it took to attain that position.
Today, Onii and Amae’s weakness shined through in their actions — the inability to act as a spy and letting emotions be involved in their mission. It was Temecula all over again.
If they could not even overcome something as trivial as this, then how will Duality accomplish their main quest?
Many often think that once someone becomes a legend, they stop having problems.
But the truth was that problems will always exist, regardless of who you are. Conflicts will happen and fights will arise in any relationship, even in a siblingship.
It was inevitable.
Onii and Amae were like any other people, capable of experiencing emotions like sadness and happiness. It was not necessarily anyone’s fault but a series of unfortunate events linked together.
Sometimes, life turns to s*** for no reason.
It spirals downward and one might feel all sort of negative emotions like pain, anger, frustration. The feeling of utter hopelessness and how no matter what one does, the results cannot be changed after the incident. There was no rewind button. No reset.
Thus, a deep and resounding sigh of all the things that could have been.
Because there were so much the two could do but remain unrealized. One day, it will happen. A moment where Duality will shine. Not as Yin or Yang but as their true identity; Amae and Onii.
So for now, it was okay to be sad.
It was okay to cry.
It was okay to release those feelings.
It was okay to be defeated.
As long as they learn to pick up themselves in the end.
And that’s exactly what the two siblings plan to do.
♦ ♦ ♦
『 Amae (04/04/20): Feelsy chapter. 』
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