Chapter 45: Moment Of Weakness (Part 2)

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Damn it! I still had some work to do! Argh… Couldn’t this moment wait at least until tomorrow? What the heck, man… → Shen

While I was crying on my own for giving the one I love an unfinished product, Sylvia looked amazed at the ring, not knowing what to do. At this view, I simply shook my head then sighed, not thinking of the ring anymore. I got up in a seated position while Sylvia was on my lap and took the ring.

“I’m really displeased with the location I’m doing this, but both of us will have to be glad about this much for now.” → Shen

I took Sylvia’s left hand in mine, then looked with a serious face in her eyes.

“Sylvia, I know about a lot of things but nothing about love. I have a lot of dreams and I’m not sure when the idea of having a family will be one of them. Until I’m done with everything, it might take years, but at the same time, the thoughts of you growing more impatient makes me more and more restless. I’m a foolish and prideful person, and this ring was also made with the selfish thoughts of placing a sign on you, telling everyone that you’re mine and taken… Sylvia, I’ll ask of you, are you able to take this selfish, arrogant, thick-skinned and idiotic man as your husband? Sylvia, will you marry me and stay by my side forever, in hard and good times… Will you wait for me?” → Shen

While talking with a self-mocking smile, I opened my palm and presented to her the ring with a solemn face. I felt hopeless at that moment. Thinking about the future, I understood that I may actually really harm her heart because of all the responsibilities on my shoulders. I felt like the thoughts of finally having my own family was too far away for me to even dream about it. But all of this only made me hate myself even more. Asking for her hand when all I could see in our future was pain and frustration, made me even more aware of how weak of a heart I have. I felt how opening up my heart was another way of showing my ugly faces.

Sylvia was surprised by how serious I was. Even though she was on top of me, she couldn’t think of this moment as ridiculous at all. She covered her mouth and started tearing up. She was aware of his thoughts and feelings, but she couldn’t blame me when what she actually wanted was exactly this: for me to be more selfish and think for myself more. Seeing how my selfish thoughts were only about her, made her feel more special for me and understood that I won’t ever wish to harm her in any way or another.

“Yes.” → Sylvia

She said while covering her face, while crystalline tears of joy filled her cheeks. This view made me feel conflicted. In a way, I wished for her to decline so she won’t have to suffer endlessly because of me. While on the other hand, I felt like jumping and crying of joy myself. It was a complicated feeling, a wave of worry rushed me in trying to make her aware with just what kind of man she’ll end up with.

“S-Sylvia, are you sure?” → Shen

Aaah~… I feel retarded… Asking such things, I just want to shut up and go with the flow… But I’d rather make a fool out of myself at this moment than see her in pain and tearing because of me in the future… Damn, I really hate love… → Shen

While stepping on my own heart, I tried to make her aware of the consequences.

“I’m really blunt and crude when it comes to conversations, you know? I can also be foolish and I might take rushed decisions because of my pride. I have knowledge about many things, but that doesn’t make me any smarter. I remember experiences from hundreds of past-lives, but that doesn’t make me any wiser. You said I think about the others a lot, but I tend to overlook their hearts. I take the simplest route and only wish to work alone. I might seem dominating and strong… But my heart is weak and sensible… Sylvia… I don’t wish for you to think of me as a Godly being. I wish that at least you will be aware of who I am… To see the young human I am.” → Shen

I felt as if I were showing my naked body to her. I felt embarrassed, worthless and weak, but at the same time, refreshed and more at ease. At least like this, I made sure she’s aware of who I am. I then looked at her with a relaxed and sincere smile while hardening my heart.

I feel like crap, but at least I won’t have any more regrets in the future. → Shen

Sylvia closed her eyes and stood in silence for a little while, then she made a little smile.

“Shen. You told me all of this so you could dodge the responsibility when you’ll hurt me in the future? I already told you everything, so now don’t expect me to take it easy, something like that?” → Sylvia
“Eh?” → Shen

I looked at her dumbfounded. I never expected her to reach such a conclusion. However, what she said seemed to be extremely justified. My face whitened and I started to panic.

“N-no! I-is not like that! I mean It does sound like that but… Look! I just tried to make you aware of how grim the future might be, okay?! Is not like I’m asking you if you’re agreeing with the terms and conditions here-!” → Shen

No wait… That’s exactly how it sounded! Ah God damn me! How could I make such a blunder in this important moment?! Uuuh~… It’s over for me now… → Shen

I felt like crying again when I suddenly hear Sylvia giggling at first, then laughing out loud holding her belly.

“W-what is it? Oy! Don’t laugh like that, please…” → Shen

Only allowed on

I looked at her helplessly while she was laughing while resting her head on my shoulder.

“I-I’m sorry Shen. It’s just- your face was so serious-Pff” → Sylvia

T-this woman! → Shen

I felt like leaving to sleep when she suddenly pushed me down again and looked at me with a playful gaze.

“Shen, you might not know. But everything you told me just now, I already knew the moment you opened your heart to me. I was able to read every part of your heart at that moment, making me aware of how complicated your character truly is.” → Sylvia
“T-that means you know… everything?” → Shen
“Yes.” → Sylvia
“T-then why-” → Shen
“Isn’t it obvious? Is because, even before you fully became aware of your feelings, I wished to be by your side forever. I left you to say everything because I felt that every time you thought of our relation, your heart would shake with worry. I knew exactly what was frustrating you, and I’m happy that you had the courage to tell me everything. Even though I never dreamed of the prideful Shen to show such a cute little side of himself. That really made my heart skip a beat, you know?” → Sylvia
“Ugh… T-then, t-that means your answer just now… was fully sincere?” → Shen
“Yes.” → Sylvia

This word was spoken with the sweetest voice and the most beautiful smile I ever saw on her face.

“…Ah.” → Shen

I was so dazed by her beauty, I almost forgot I had to do something after gaining the answer. I took her left hand and with trembling hands, I inserted the ring on her ring finger. I exhaled, happy that everything went, more or less, well, without me doing anything stupid… again.

“Shen, this ring!” → Sylvia

When I inserted the ring on her finger, she suddenly felt hot and from the base of her spine to the top her head, something hot was rising. I was surprised at first by her reaction, then understood instantly what was happening.

Haah, haah, haah… Shen, what’s happening?” → Sylvia

“It’s alright. You feel hot because the chakras are activating and the hotness you feel on your spine is a spiral of power which grows until it touches the heavens… But if it’s too painful, then just take off the ring. I’ll stabilize your circulation so nothing would happen.” → Shen

I was a little bit worried. I learned of this spiral from Earth with that small and thin energy field around it. This planet had the field hundreds of times stronger than the one from Earth.

If bad turns to worst, I’ll simply take it off and give her a normal one… I’m such an idiot, I should have tested it on myself first. → Shen

I started to feel some regret when I saw on Sylvia’s back 2 lines growing from under her shirt. They had a red and blue color and entangled themselves for 7 times along her back. Without thinking, I undressed Sylvia from her shirt to see where the lines would continue. They did so until they touched the top of her head, where after that, a white aura appeared above her. I looked with wide open eyes at the glob of light which was slowly entering her from atop her head.

‘This… this is kundalini?! Is almost as powerful as the one from my dreams! How can Sylvia’s inner talent be so strong?!… It seems I didn’t make the wrong decision. → Shen

Kundalini was a form of power that could awake the inner strength of a person. No matter of the talent, appearance, knowledge or influence, the power of the kundalini was strictly focused on the power of the soul. The stronger the soul, the more powerful one could grow through this technique.

Haah, haah, haah… Shen… I feel so hot, I’m feeling like I’m on fire…” → Sylvia

Sylvia’s skin turned from white to red and her heartbeat together with her breathing accelerated above the norms.

“It’s all right. I’ll do everything from here, all you need to do is just let the energy to circulate inside your body. After this, I’ll ask you to be careful with every move you make, all right?” → Shen

I think I just created a monster… → Shen

I thought with a wry smile. Kundalini would mostly show its powers through physical strength. Now Sylvia’s brute power was as strong as mine if I were to use Draconic Materialisation, which is double my actual physical strength.

I visualized the energy circulating through her meridians by focusing on feeling her chi. The energy was so pure and powerful, it was close to Ryu’s primordial energy of creation. However, this one had no impurities and was nourishing every meridian and chakra inside the body, making Sylvia stronger after every second. To be sure nothing unforeseen happened, I tried to stabilize her body-temperature by cooling her down. I touched her chest and stomach with my palms while I was imbuing frost element through my arms. After 5 minutes, her skin color returned back to the beautiful white and the two incandescent lines disappeared, leaving behind only barely visible lines which were almost as white as her skin color.

Haah, haah, haah… Mmm~…” → Sylvia

Being under her, I felt her warmth in full, having to cover myself with a cold wind so I won’t sweat. Sylvia’s breathing stabilized then she looked a little bit confused at her own hands when she starts to feel something.

“Huh?” → Sylvia

She was shocked to feel this much power circulating through her body after only six minutes.

Is this really my body? I feel like a completely different person! Now my rank is, Saint? And an Adept one?! → Sylvia

She then looked at me and hugged me tightly, a bright smile on her face.

“I thank you for this beautiful gift, I don’t know how I could ever repay you.” → Sylvia

“Repay me? Aren’t you my wife now? There is no need for payment. Even if you ever wish to leave, I won’t ask for anything.” → Shen

I said with a matter of fact voice. Sylvia looked at me with a revolted look then said.

“What do you mean ‘leave you’?! I’ll never do that!” → Sylvia

She was a little bit annoyed by my remarks then she took hold of my collar and asked.

“Should I prove it in a way?” → Sylvia

“Nope, no need, I got you.” → Shen

Wah, she’s really scary when angered… And she’s too damn close! → Shen

“For this, I’ll need to punish you. Wishing to get rid of me right after asking for my hand? You have some guts, you know~? And seeing how you already undressed my upper part, should I take it as some kind of provocation?” → Sylvia

She looked at her own exposed breasts, then back at me devilishly while she approached and bit my ear gently.

“I-I just wanted to see where the lines will go, a-and-… Argh! Why do I need to explain myself now?! You, come here!” → Shen

I felt irritated and pushed her down. My eyes were like those of a wolf, looking at Sylvia with lust and desire.

Grr~… should I just ravage her? → Shen

A dark mist escaped my heart and my eyes started to turn brown.

‘Damn it! NO! Control yourself, idiot! Doing such things for lust is just… I’m still not ready it seems. → Shen

I calmed myself and wished to get up when I felt a strong grip on my wrist. The grip was so strong, my bone almost broke. By reflex, I grabbed back by making an underhand move, changing the one who was grabbing to me.

“…Please control your power, Sylvia.” → Shen

“Huh?” → Sylvia

Sylvia saw my wrist starting to swell up with a purple color. She was completely shocked by the bruise she made on my arm. Her face whitened even more while talking with panic voice.

“S-sorry Shen, I didn’t want to harm you! I-I saw you want to leave just now and I thought you might have got fed up with my teasing. I’m sorry, please don’t be angry…” → Sylvia

She felt extremely apologetic making me look at her with some surprise.

Well. I’m not mad in the slightest, but why is she so afraid all the time that I would get angry? Just what is her past about? → Shen

Sylvia was completely shocked by what happened. She couldn’t understand why I wanted to leave. When she wanted to grab my arm and ask what happened, she used too much force and almost broke my wrist. Everything turned for the worse and she didn’t know why. For some reason, she was really terrified about the idea of me getting angered at her, even though in truth, her ridiculous power made me more at ease that she would be able to take care of herself in the future.

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